The Fraud

Zadie Smith

“If witness examination was a form of stimulation, it affected the two women differently. Provoking on one a great hunger—easily satisfied by a braised pork chop—and in the other, a compulsion to walk, despite the cold.” p. 206

“‘They are famous for their chops, Mr Bogel,’ murmured Mrs Touchet, and was quiet for a moment. Had she ever gone without a meal, even once, in her whole life?'“ p. 238

“‘—I haven’t finished: the daughters, a stupendous goose, seasoned by our own Mrs Touchet, some literary bonbons straight from Paris, fresh peas from this very garden, many things in aspic courtesy of I don’t know who and from where I couldn’t say….’” p. 217

“Round the back of Gore House, through a double trellis of briar rose, she round herself standing in a walled kitchen garden, aimless between lines of lettuce. A strong east wind blew strands of hair into her mouth.” p. 162

“Mrs Touchet was amused: ‘We shall add this task to the lists of harassed lady housekeepers across the nation: One. Buy no sugar. Two. Remember to get oranges. Three. Plead for the oppressed…’” p. 101

“She remembered a baker’s shop in King’s Street: a lemon cake was selected. All three of them put a hand to the cake-box in the cab, to steady it, and the silliness of this meant that they arrived at Miss Harding’s School for Young Ladies in too light a mood for the errand upon which they had come.” p. 358

“‘More port!’

‘Yes, one more bottle!’

‘Gentlemen, I warn you: what I am about to read is such a piece of puffery, so horrendously flattering to its subject, that a mere bottle will hardly suffice. a gallon on port will be required to offset it.’” pg. 117